36 confirmed cockroach kills

i only know because i count them
the dessicating legs splayed
the withering antennae drooping
the boric powder still gracing my kitchen counter
after 5 months, i haven't cleaned up the corpses

my bathroom light has been burned out for 3 months
i bought 2 candles
but i never light them
i shower in the dark
i shave in a shadow
and it never occurs to me to change the light

i have sand in my shoes
both pairs of them
it annoys me when i'm wearing either pair
but when i take my shoes off
i forget about the sand
until i put them on again
but by then it's too late

i have clothes in the dryer that have been there
since i left for vacation
socks, shirts, pants
when i came back, i said that i would put them away
i haven't



sometimes i want to save the world
but i  realize that i don't want to save the world
i don't even want to save someone else
i want someone to tell me to change my light
to empty the dryer and my shoes
to clean up the counter
someone who allows me to smile when i'm alone.